Help needed, I am lost

[flyingfairy]

I left school after sitting my GCSE'S it just so happened that it was my last year in school when my EDS first came about. I didn't attend school at all as my local hospital advised me that it would be a good idea. But i managed to sit my GCSE's no thanks to my school and come out with 4 B'S and 4 D's. As i still had no diagonise at this time the hospital advised me to take a year out. Which i did. In this year i got my diagonise and started to learn how to deal with my EDS.

I decided that i needed to further my education. I had no idea what i wanted to do. I had always dreamed of becoming a midwife. But since being misssed around by the hospital so much i decided that there was no way i was going to be able to work in the NHS.

So i decided that in september i was going to start college and train to be a sports development officer. People were telling me this wasn't going to be a good course for me but the college seemed fine with it so i was happy.

Then the week came to start college i couldn't walk i was like this for the next 3 weeks college said it wasn't the right time to be starting. I felt let down i didn't know weither the course was the right one after all.

Now i am stuck. I don't know what to do. My life has involid around sports so much. I am really stuck. My EDS is getting alot worse than i expected it to. I am trying to stay in shape the best i can to try and break to chain.

I am finding things really tough at the moment. I don't know what i want to do or even if i am capable of doing a full time job. I have always wanted to be a midwife but that isn't a option anymore.

Help needed

[LianneS]

Why isnt being a midwife an option anymore?

I understand it can be demanding but once qualified one of the great things about the NHS is they are quite happy for people to work part time or on a job share basis...

Sometimes following your dream is not the easy option but more often than not its the right one..

Lianne

[Sez]

My problem is that I don't know what I want to do with myself

I think if you've got a dream of being a midwife, then you should go for it. There's no reason why you can't, and once you're qualified you don't have to work for the NHS. I'm sure there are private organisations as well (aren't there??) or you could use the qualification to do something related. But once you're qualified then it's down to you what you want to do with your qualification. I've got this vague notion of being a psychologist but once I'm qualified I could do anything I want with it - become an Educational psychologist, become a psychology teacher, put it towards training for a similar role...

I think a lot of this, as with your weight loss thread, comes down to having faith in yourself and belief that you really can turn your life around.

[Retro]

One of my friends is a Community Midwife so she has 1 to 1 contact with her pre-natal Mum's throughout their pregnancies and then for a week or so after baby's born, this might be something to consider depending on what areas of midwifery you're interested in.

[suzannehorne]

I personally think you should go with your heart, and if you want to be a midwife go for it. From a young age I always wanted to become a primary teacher, and when I was diagnosed with HMS in 2003, my parents and teachers thought I should choice a degree that is less practical. They all had the fear that because the degree I wanted to do was so practical I do end up making myself worse. However despite recommodations from my parents and teachers, I applied for my BEd primary teaching. I am currently seven weeks into my first year course, and loving it. My parents now realise that I did have to follow my heart, and that there was no point of me doing a degree that I was not going to enjoy. Although I am exhausted and the pain is really bad, the university have been so supportive and I would not change my degree for the world.
Hope this helps!

[Sola^]

I think that you should become something that interests you. Where's the motivation if you study something that don't interests you? I know I couldn't... (but I don't have to battle the extra challenge of HMS).

[flyingfairy]

I know i don't have any self belief at the moment. The last 2 years have taken a great deal out of me.

I have beeen looking into things over the last couple of days. And am interested in becoming a birthing doula. That way i can work when i want to and am able to. Also it is doing something that i believe in without working in the NHS. You also don't needed and really training. Where as if i became a midwife i would have to sit my A levels then go to university. So you are talking another 5 years. I don't know what i will be like next week let alone in 5 years. I don't feel i can tie myself down like this.

[Sola^]

I've struggled with not knowing what to do myself. But I think I've finally found an education that motivates me enough to get through college The only negative thing is that I think I'm getting a degree that won't get me a job afterwards... :p I hope I will though...

[LianneS]

Where as if i became a midwife i would have to sit my A levels then go to university. So you are talking another 5 years. I don't know what i will be like next week let alone in 5 years. I don't feel i can tie myself down like this.

You dont have to have the A Levels..... you can actually do an Access course which is just one year in duration and can get you into university after completing it... My friend is doing this as we speak...she too wants to be a midwife and has no qualifications at all (even GCSE's) she is really enjoying the access course and is in the process of doing her personal statement for applying to university.... Ive never heard of a birthing doula...am presuming its some kind of assistant role? If youre happy with that go for it...but just dont forget about becoming a qualified midwife cos you think it will be too long training and too hard on you.... Life is too short, follow your dreams, you will regret it if you dont...


Keep us informed as to what you do and good luck
Lianne

[Sez]

I agree with Lianne that life is too short.

Have you spoken to your local Job Centre Plus? Their disability advisor might be able to tell you whether they can offer help or funding for your course (i.e. they can provide money for a suitable supporting chair for whilst you are writing coursework at home).