Insensitive comments

[sheppeyescapee]

Was rather flustered and annoyed when the consultant I saw at RNHRD suggested that I couldn't possibly be subluxing and dislocating without having to go to the hospital! This was someone who works in a hypermobility clinic I avoid the hospital as much as possible because my local one doesn't have a clue and put my foot in plaster while it was still out.

[Fiona-Jane]

we must have seen different specialists cos mine didn't have any problems believing me........


it's awful how specialists in our condition can still have that attitude

fi xx

[trekster]

If you don't feel like explaining yourself, these are some pretty good comebacks for the "What happened to you this time" question: http://www.bbc.co.uk/ouch/play/top_ten/ ... hat-.shtml

M personal favourite is no. 4, and I have been known to use it

Number 3 is offensive.

[trekster]

Going back to the comments about taking mum to the specialist......that's not possible because my physio
doesn't recommend my wheelchair and my rhemy doesn't know I have one (and is discharging me in March).

Also shocked sheepy at what the so called expert said about dislocations. I find it hard to communicate dislocations
and prefer to reset them myself. Considering the damage they did to your ankle I would have done the same.

I went out for a xmas meal with some of the autistics tonight. It was good except for 2 insensitive comments.

I went to the disabled toilet and asked who was next, my friend said 'you I guess' and the man standing next
to the toilet didn't say anything. While I was in there he told his friend 'the damned wheelchairs gone in now'.
I felt like saying to him 'this damned wheelchair did ask who was next before using the toilet'! I'm thinking
it's an accessible toilet for a reason, yes he was a pensioner and probably had a reason to use it. He shouldn't
have had a problem with me using it, could have said 'I was next as it happens' or something similar.

Another time I went to the disabled toilet I came out and the guy who winds me up at social groups was there.
I asked him 'to open the door please' in a polite way. His response 'no Alexis because you can walk'. I followed him
and had a go in front of the other 2 volunteers 'excuse me but dont make presumptions about my disability. I am
in this wheelchair because I dislocate my joints. Ask next time before making presumptions about my disability'.
I was really annoyed with him because he's had at least 5 opportunities to ask me why I need the wheelchair and was
there when I showed my other bendy friend my diagnosis letter. Also there's rumours going around that he is telling
others that 'I shouldn't be using the wheelchair because I can walk'.

[DeeNJai]

some people take a long time before can take in, it took my niece years before she was happy with the chair.
dee

[Makeoohsothoughtful]

It is out of order to say those things though because even if you were not in a wheelchair and walking if somone asked you to open a door not doing so is rude.
people who are perfectly able hold doors open for each other all the time.

to deliberatly say no, is just to try and antagonise a situation,

[trekster]

Thanks for your support friends, this guy had ample opportunity to ask why I needed the wheelchair but choose not to ask.
Also another person can struggle a short distance without their chair and his reason for walking hasn't been questioned.

Update was told today that one of the volunteers tried to speak to this guy after I wheeled off but he was arrogant and unpleasant.
Good that i have some back up and support in the social group.

[Still_Smiling]

Purplesheep, that cheered me up so much! Think I might make use of number 4 also!!

Katie

[trekster]

My mum told me it was all in my head and my ribs couldn't possibly be subluxing today.
I told her I have 3 diagnosis letters and it is in my collagen as it happens.

[Stone]

If you don't feel like explaining yourself, these are some pretty good comebacks for the "What happened to you this time" question: http://www.bbc.co.uk/ouch/play/top_ten/ ... hat-.shtml

M personal favourite is no. 4, and I have been known to use it

I'm going to start using number 1

Stone

[trekster]

Brought up the subject about people who can walk and use wheelchairs with another member tonight
in front of the guy who questioned my need for a wheelchair. Hope he's got the message now.

[loosebones]

I had a response to my ankle complaint that I had put in during the summer when the consultant said I couldn't possibly be dislocating my ankle as it's not flexible, I wan't in enough pain and so on. Basically I had a vague response to the complaint refuting everything so I requested a copy of what the consultants has written in response to my complaint.
In this letter one particular consultant has called me malicious and manipulative. I'm sure this crosses the line and will be pursuing this further after Xmas.

[Blaadyblah]

Sounds like a good plan to take a week or so to digest and mull it over, then come out fighting your corner in the new year. So pleased you're still wanting to pursue this after the last few weeks being so rough. Is it even remotely possible that his failure to deal with you adequately could have contributed to that latest crisis?

[trekster]

Good luck loosebones.

[trekster]

'i really dont beleive that's the case' in response to me explaining for the umpteenth time that i cant do tasks involving standing
or lifting.