I hope its ok but I really wanted to write as I feel quite down at the moment...
Over the last few weeks the pain in my back and hips has reappeared (I've tried a lot of drugs for my colitis, one of which worked amazingly and for joint pain too and was the best thing since sliced bread... Until I was drastically allergic to it and ended up in hospital with a temperature of 40, delerious and close to having a seizure apparently).
When I say reappeared I mean ... I didn't think it was possible that something could hurt this much. it was getting painful but gradually so I wasn't using crutches yet, and then I made the somewhat catastrophic error of going to london for a weekend without them too. And that landed me in so much pain I was in a cafe throwing up in the loos it was that bad.
Now there's no chance of me walking anywhere without crutches, we got home yesterday from town and I put them down and stood up straight after taking off my trainers and then fainted - it was like the pain just shot through my body and I went unbelievably dizzy and then passed out.
I'm at a bit of a loss really,... The crutches help - I wouldn't be able to go anywhere without, but not as much as they used to, and now sitting at my desk at work is killing me too - same dizziness and having to go and be sick sometimes too.
No meds work, and I've tried everything, I mean literally everything. Anything that could potentially work knocks me out to the point I can't function at all so I've had to stop. I am absolutely terrified to be honest because this pain seems to do nothing than get worse. I don't know how to deal with the fact that unlike last time I used them, the crutches were a massive help and made things so much easier, but this time its not like that - I am having to get my head around it not being a choice but a necessity - I'm not able to walk without. In short, I can't cope., and fear never being able to not use them now!!
Any words of advice... Or anything really, would be Appreciated!!
Much love xxx